This might be the most difficult post I’ll ever have to write. I can actually feel tears forming.
Allow me to explain my absence in recent months. This semester was a rough one. On top of the usual trappings that come with being a college student, I got a new part-time job that requires me coming home on weekends (at least it’s at a movie theater!) and I had another bout of crippling anxiety and depression. The fact that the USA elected its first fascist dictator certainly didn’t help things, either.
In its own little way, Donald Trump’s election made me completely re-evaluate my life goals. I realized I didn’t want a job where the führer wants me lynched, and I hated my journalism class with every ounce of my soul, so I almost immediately shifted gears from journo to public relations and dropped both of my minors. It totally makes sense, though. I took Intro to PR last fall and fell madly in love with it.
Long story short, I wasn’t reviewing movies because I was dealing with a lot of crap, from a national level all the way down to a personal level.
An even bigger truth — and this breaks my heart to admit it — I felt burnt out. Too many reviews in such a short time frame took its toll on me and it eventually lost its fun. I felt like everything I could say had been said already.
Still, I plugged away at something I had no time or energy for. I promised Nopevember: Election Year and a review of The Star Wars Holiday Special and came through with JACK SQUAT.
The last two and a half years have been life-changing for me. I met some incredible people, learned so much about cinema, and learned even more about myself as a person. I was afforded several amazing opportunities, including writing movie reviews for RIT’s magazine, and appearing on a podcast.
Which is why it is with great sadness that I announce the end of Carly Hearts Movies. This was not an easy decision to make, nor was it a quick and impulsive one, but it’s one I had to make at some point in my life, and that point came sooner than I expected. I’ve decided not to renew my URL and will spend the next few days saving all my reviews so they don’t get lost forever (as Word documents and on Letterboxd.) Instead, I am going to work on making my second site, The Hollywood Hellion, officially a thing.
I’m not vanishing from the internet entirely and I’m never going to stop watching movies and talking about them. I’m not going to retire completely from reviewing movies. If anything, I’m taking a break, rebranding myself, and improving my craft, so I can re-emerge with a vengeance. You can still follow me on Twitter and Letterboxd (again, guys… THAT is where the fun is!) Or look at my about.me, which is how I manage all my social medias.
Thank you so much for your unwavering support and camaraderie. I will cherish this experience for the rest of my life and know one day it will be useful to me out in the real world.